"...is calling the rumors of an alien lovechild ridiculous slander. And in other news, crews continue to search the Selvadoradan jungle for signs of a missing plane that went down Saturday, which was carrying the all members of the uncontroversial boy band Promise Ring. Hundreds of fans continue to hold vigil at the embassy, playing their hit single "Girl, I Respect You Too Much" on a loop until Emerson, Josiah, Raylan, Lincoln and Dmitri are found." #boybandchallenge #sakuraleon #karmafishes